I dont like depending on people, things, or really anything besides me. I have one of those wonderfully annoying personalities that thinks I can do everything better myself. Its not true of course, nor is it good for a husband wife relationship. In fact I can do little better than Ben with the exception of putting on make up, making the bed, and painting my nails (not trying to be cliche just stating facts). Right now I can only walk around using crutches and i’m supposed to limit that, however the bruises under my armpits tell a different story. I have to depend on Ben for everything, right down to helping me get dressed. Most wives would love for their husbands to have to take care of them for a week I on the other hand feel annoying. I hate constantly asking him for ice packs, water, pills, and Popsicles. He on the other hand thinks its a nice change of pace rather than me always telling him I can do it myself, which most of the time isn’t even true. Ben loves helping and always tells me “you just have to ask”.
I started thinking today that God is up there thinking the same thing about me, “why don’t you ask for my help”. Life on earth is filled with times of crutches and God is there to be our helper in these hard times, in the bible it even talks about him carrying us in the hard times. Boy could I use that this week. The problem is we would rather crutch around on our own than be dependent on something other than ourselves. I find it much easier to hobble through life sometimes than to stop and ask him for help. God isn’t idle but he also isn’t a pusher. He walks along side us waiting, all along the rough patches whispering to us, “If you would just ask me”. Most people are like me though, we just keep hobbling knowing eventually we can make it, even if we are broken and in pain. Why do we have such a hard time humbling ourselves before God and asking for help?
It’s just a thought I had as I fell again this morning trying to do something Ben is supposed to help me with. A little frustrated he said, “why won’t you just ask me” and if i’m honest the truth is because I want to do it on my own. Do we really think the same way about God? Do we really tell him, no Thanks, I mean you made me and all but I got this one?
Praise be to the LORD,
for he has heard my cry for mercy.
The LORD is my strength and my shield;
my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.
My heart leaps for joy,
and with my song I praise him.
My other little helper