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Tindell Baldwin »

When There is Just One Size and You don’t Fit….

I did the atkins diet in high school, pretty incorrectly I should add, I don’t remember why… I’m sure I had some life altering event like a spring break full of tiny bikinis or a prom dress that involved actually body morphing to fit into. I remember thinking I needed to loose five pounds and FAST (because when you are 16 there is no time to spare) and I read about this diet where you could eat all fat and cut out bread. In my head this was perfect because I could eat a hamburger without a bun and there was no need for bacon to be sandwiched between something that would only diminish its flavor. So I served myself three heaping meals of meat, very little veggies and fruits, and was sick with in one week.  I stuck to it for a few weeks until I was seriously ill and realizing that maybe I was ok with the extra few pounds.

In reality I never had any real issues with my weight but it didn’t matter what the scale said I always wanted to be thinner.  I was chasing the illusive “thin enough” and I didn’t realize I would never get there. I’d think I was doing pretty well until I saw my friend’s clothes or looked through the latest cosmo magazine and the insecurities would hit like a ton of bricks. Luckily my mom wasn’t the kind to feed the insecurities she was more the kind of mom who fed you TCBY when the day brought tears.

I say all this because I just read about a hot new brand aimed at teenagers that carries one size… small. The article included screen shots of teenage girls tweeting about how depressed they were that they didn’t fit into said brand. I wanted to take each girl out to a little TCBY and tell her that small isn’t the only size. As someone who used to define myself by the size of my pants, and if I’m honest still struggles on days, I can commiserate but what I’d tell them over a nice LARGE cup of frozen yogurt is that beauty has all kinds of looks and sizes. What I’d tell them is while my pants might have gotten a touch larger in this body that has housed and birthed two kids my heart has never felt fuller.

I was thinking about this as I got my daughter dressed this morning, she wrapped her chubby little arms around my neck and smiled because life is still good. I want more than anything to protect her innocence, to shelter her from a world that will start lying to her earlier than I care to admit. A world that will give her one mold to fit into and leave her questioning her worth or starving herself to be someone else’s idea of perfect. A world that tells her small is the only option and if you don’t fit get out.

I haven’t quite figured out how to shut out the lies but my goal is to be even louder with the truth. To tell her she is fearfully and wonderfully made. To tell her God made her with great care. To tell her she is worthy and beautiful and to take her out to a nice big cup of frozen yogurt when that isn’t quite enough.

Psalm 139:14

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

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